Quarantine thoughts...

Unlike most people my age, selfishly, I have genuinely enjoyed this nationwide shut down. Spending time together as a family and getting outside in the middle of the day has been refreshing.

I know there as millions of people who have lost their jobs and have nowhere to turn, I feel awful about that, and I can completely understand the need for things to go back to normal. People with businesses that were shut down may never recover. Just heartbreaking. I can't imagine what other families who are not as lucky to still be receiving steady income are going through.
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This virus is sad and scary. Everything going on related to COVID-19 has been...crazy. It's taken so many lives.
When the shelter in place went into effect in early March, my anxiety was high. I didn't know how serious to take it. I was lost in watching everything unfold. The news and scrolling through social media was frightening. A pandemic is something I never thought I would see in my lifetime. After all, it's 2020, things like this don't happen, but obviously...they do.

Patrick and I both educators in the public school system, and we were just coming off of spring break when all of this started. When we heard that we would not be returning back to school anytime soon, we were devasted. I know what you're thinking, "what is there to complain about, you don't have to go to work, and you're still getting paid." While we were extremely grateful stomach still be receiving our steady income, schools closing was nothing for us to celebrate. We spend more time in the day with the students we teach than with our own kids. They become ours. We develop these connections and relationships with the kids in our classroom, and knowing we wouldn't see them for the remainder of the school year was a huge gut punch in the stomach.

Like most of you, I went straight into panic mode as well, though I was not one of the ones hoarding toilet paper and paper towels. I did make sure my family and I had everything we needed for two weeks at a time. That included diapers, wipes, food, and other personal items that we use daily. We didn't go anywhere for literally the first 2 weeks. The grocery stores were crazy. I even went one morning and had to stand in line. We stayed home for the first to weeks, only leaving to get take out every now and then. After the initial panic, we began to venture out a little, and we would go to our parent's house from time to time, so we didn't go completely stir crazy. Once the shelter in place was officially lifted, we continued to stay at home.

This time at home with my family these last few months have been the best. In our everyday lives, we'd never be able to spend this much-uninterrupted quality time together. I've enjoyed waking up to the sounds of tiny little feet running into our room and say "hi mama, hi mama" over and over again until I finally crawl out of bed. I've enjoyed taking my time and making meals at home with my favorite songs playing in the kitchen, taking random walks in the middle of the day, and juggling with my man in the middle of the day when the boys have their afternoon nap. It' s been bliss. There has been so much time to reflect on this season of my life, and man, I am grateful. Truly blessed, I should say.

Now don't get me wrong it has been hard too. Trapped in an apartment with two toddlers has tested every bit of me. Some days my patience is thin as tissue paper, as my grandma would say. The tantrums seem to never end, no one is ever 100% happy and won't eat their food. They make a mess in every room, and demand things from me all day long. Sometimes I feel like.....I need to escape. But until then, I keep it together, cry in the shower/laundry room, handle it tomorrow. And remember how blessed I am. Mama, you got this.

Let me know your quarantine thoughts and what your days during this pandemic look like in the comments below.

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